Just one glimpse...Only because of Jesus Christ can we love despite and not love because.
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Name: Esther
Country: United States
State: California
Birthday: 4/21/1984
Gender: Female


Occupation: Student
Industry: Education/Research


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Member Since: 11/7/2002

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Wednesday, June 23, 2004

My last entry: I'm quitting xanga because it feeds each persons' narcissism (I am talking about my own as well) and I refuse to relate to people in such a impersonal distorted manner.


Friday, June 04, 2004

http://www.calvarychapel.com/simivalley/library_commentaries.html <---That's the link for David Guzik's commentary on the Bible.

Commentary on 1 Corinthians 15 by David Guzik:
(This is for Huy to read between studying )

2. (3-4) The content of the gospel Paul preached.

 

For I delivered to you first of all that which I also received: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, and that He was buried, and that He rose again the third day according to the Scriptures.

 

a. For I delivered to you first of all that which I also received: Paul did not make up this gospel.  He received it (and not from man, but from Jesus Christ, according to Galatians 1:11-12), and he delivered it.  This is not “Paul’s gospel” in the sense that he created it or fashioned it; it is “Paul’s gospel” in the sense that he personally believes it and spreads it.

 

i. “Notice that the preacher does not make the gospel.  If he makes it, it is not worth your having.  Originality in preaching, if it be originality in the statement of doctrine, is falsehood.  We are not makers and inventors; we are repeaters, we tell the message we have received.” (Spurgeon)

 

b. As Paul describes the gospel in the following verses, it is important to notice that this gospel is not insightful teaching or good advice.  At the core of the gospel are things that happened, actual, real, historical events.  The gospel isn’t a matter of religious opinions, platitudes, or fairy tales, but about real historical events.

 

i. “Our religion is not based upon opinions, but upon facts.  We hear persons sometimes saying, ‘Those are your views, and these are ours.’  Whatever your ‘views’ may be, is a small matter; what are the facts of the case?” (Spurgeon)

 

c. Christ died: The death of Jesus Christ, the Messiah, the Son of God, the center of the gospel.  Though the idea of glorying in the death of a Savior was foolishness to the word, it is salvation to those who will believe.

 

i. How did Jesus die?  The Roman government executed Him, by one of the most cruel and excruciating forms of capital punishment ever devised, crucifixion.

 

ii. “Although the Romans did not invent crucifixion, they perfected it as a form of torture and capital punishment that was designed to produce a slow death with maximum pain and suffering.” (Edwards)  What exactly was it like to be crucified?  In days the New Testament was first written, the practice needed no explanation.  But we would do well to appreciate just what happened when someone was crucified.

 

iii. The victim’s back would first be torn open by the scourging, and then the clotting blood would be ripped open again when the clothes were torn off the victim.  When he was thrown on the ground to nail his hands to the crossbeam, the wounds would again be torn open and contaminated with dirt.  Then, as he hung on the cross, with each breath, the painful wounds on the back would scrape against the rough wood of the upright beam and be further aggravated.

 

iv. When the nail was driven through the wrists, it would sever the large median nerve.  This stimulated nerve would produce excruciating bolts of fiery pain in both arms, and could result in a claw-like grip in the victim’s hands.

 

v. Beyond the excruciating pain, the major effect of crucifixion was to inhibit normal breathing.  The weight of the body, pulling down on the arms and shoulders, would tend to fix the respiratory muscles in an inhalation state, and hinder exhalation.  The lack of adequate respiration would result in severe muscle cramps, which would hinder breathing even further.  To get a good breath, one would have to push against the feet, and flex the elbows, pulling from the shoulders.  Putting the weight of the body on the feet would produce searing pain, and flexing of the elbows would twist the hands hanging on the nails.  Lifting the body for a breath would also painfully scrape the back against the rough wooden post.  Each effort to get a proper breath would be agonizing, exhausting, and lead to a sooner death.

 

vi. “Not uncommonly, insects would light upon or burrow into the open wounds or the eyes, ears, and nose of the dying and helpless victim, and birds of prey would tear at these sites.  Moreover, it was customary to leave the corpse on the cross to be devoured by predatory animals.” (Edwards)

 

vii. Death from crucifixion could come from many sources: acute shock from blood loss; being too exhausted to breathe any longer; dehydration; stress-induced heart attack, or congestive heart failure leading to a cardiac rupture.  If the victim did not die quickly enough, the legs would be broken, and the victim would soon be unable to breathe.

 

viii. How bad was crucifixion?  We get our English word excruciating from the Roman word “out of the cross.”  “Consider how heinous sin must be in the sight of God, when it requires such a sacrifice!” (Clarke)

 

ix. However, we never speak of the physical sufferings of Jesus to make us feel sorry for Jesus, as if He needed our pity.  Save your pity for those who reject the complete work of Jesus on the cross at Calvary; for those preachers who do not have the heart of Paul in 1 Corinthians 1:23, when he proclaimed the center of the Christian message: we preach Christ crucified.

 

d. Christ died for our sins: What does it mean that Jesus died for our sins?  How does His death do anything for our sins?  Many noble men and women have died horrible deaths for righteous causes through the centuries.  How does the death of Jesus do anything for our sins?

I

 

 

 

 

i. At some point before He died, before the veil was torn in two, before He cried out it is finished, an awesome spiritual transaction took place - the Father laid upon Jesus all the guilt and wrath our sin deserved, and He bore it in Himself perfectly, totally satisfying the wrath of God for us.

 

ii. As horrible as the physical suffering of Jesus was, this spiritual suffering - the act of being judged for sin in our place - was what Jesus really dreaded about the cross; this was the cup - the cup of God’s righteous wrath - that He trembled at drinking (Luke 22:39-46; Psalm 75:8; Isaiah 51:17; Jeremiah 25:15).  On the cross, Jesus became, as it were, an enemy of God, who was judged and forced to drink the cup of the Father’s fury, so we would not have to drink that cup.

 

iii. Isaiah 53:3-5 puts it powerfully: He is despised and rejected by men, A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him; He was despised, and we did not esteem Him.  Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed Him stricken, Smitten by God, and afflicted.  But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed.

 

iv. “Reader!  one drop of this cup would bear down thy soul to endless ruin; and these agonies would annihilate the universe.  He suffered alone: for the people there was none with him; because his sufferings were to make an atonement for the sins of the world: and in the work of redemption he had no helper.” (Clarke)

 

v. And when that was accomplished (who knows how long it could have lasted?), there was no reason for Jesus to “hang around” on the cross - His work was done, He could go on now.

 

e. For our sins: Our sins were responsible for the death of Jesus.  He did not die for a political cause, or as an enemy of the state, or for someone’s envy.  Jesus died for our sins.  Jesus did not die as a mere martyr for a cause.

 

f. He was buried: We don’t often think of the burial of Jesus as part of the gospel, but it is.  The burial of Jesus is important for many reasons.  It is proof positive that He really died, because you don’t bury someone unless they are really dead, and Jesus’ death was confirmed at the cross before He was taken down to be buried (John 19:31-37).  Jesus’ burial is also important because it fulfilled the Scriptures which declared, And they made His grave with the wicked; but with the rich at His death (Isaiah 53:9).  Jesus was buried in the tomb of a rich man (Matthew 27:57-60).

 

g. He rose again: This truth is essential to the gospel.  Why, if Jesus died on the cross to pay for our sins and remove our guilt, why is the resurrection of Jesus so important?

 

i. Although Jesus bore the full wrath of God on the cross, as if He were a guilty sinner, guilty of all our sin, even being made sin for us (2 Corinthians 5:21), He Himself did not become a sinner.   Even the act of taking our sin was an act of holy, giving love for us - so that Jesus Himself did not become a sinner, even though He bore the full guilt of our sin.  This is the gospel message!  That Jesus took our punishment for sin on the cross, and remained a perfect Savior through the whole ordeal - proved by His resurrection.

 

ii. For this reason, He remained the Holy One (Acts 2:27, 31-32), even in His death.  Since it was incomprehensible that God’s Holy One could be bound by death, the resurrection was absolutely inevitable.

 

iii. Therefore, the resurrection of Jesus is not some “add on” to a “more important” work on the cross.  If the cross is the payment for our sins, the empty tomb is the receipt, showing that the perfect Son of God made perfect payment for our sins.  The payment itself is of little good without the receipt!  This is why the resurrection of Jesus was such a prominent theme in the evangelistic preaching of the early church (Acts 2:24, 3:15, 4:10, 13:30-39).

 

iv. The cross was a time of victorious death, a negative triumph.  Sin was defeated, but nothing positive was put in its place until the resurrection.  The resurrection showed that Jesus did not succumb to the inevitable result of sin.  The resurrection is proof of His conquest.

 

h. He rose again the third day: The fact that Jesus rose again the third day is part of the gospel.  Jesus was a unique case.  He did not or will not rise at some “general” resurrection of the dead.  Instead He rose the third day after His death.  This also demonstrates Jesus’ credibility, because He proclaimed He would rise three days after His death (Matthew 16:21, 17:23, 20:19).

 

i. Because of the reference to the third day, and because in Matthew 12:40 Jesus refers to three days and three nights, some have thought it necessary for Jesus to spend at least 72 hours in the grave.  This upsets most chronologies of the death and resurrection of Jesus, and is unnecessary, being unaware of the use of ancient figures of speech.  Eleazar ben Azariah (around the year 100 a.d.) said: “A day and a night make a whole day, and a portion of a whole day is reckoned as a whole day.”  This demonstrates how in Jesus’ day, the phrase three days and three nights did not necessarily mean a 72-hour period, but a period including at least the portions of three days and three nights.

 

ii. “According to Jewish reckoning, ‘three days’ would include parts of Friday afternoon, all of Saturday, and Sunday morning.” (Mare)

 

i. According to the Scriptures: Because this idea is so important, Paul repeats it twice in these two verses.  Jesus’ work for us didn’t just come out of thin air; it was planned from all eternity and described prophetically in the Scriptures.

 

i. The plan for His death is described in places like Psalm 22 and Isaiah 53.

 

ii. The plan for His resurrection is described in places like Hosea 6:2, Jonah 1:17, Psalm 16:10, as well as the scenario in Genesis 22, where Isaac, as a type of Christ, is “raised” on the third day of their journey, at the beginning of which Abraham had reckoned his son dead.

 

iii. Admittedly, the Old Testament understanding of resurrection was shadowy; many passages look to a bleak existence after death (Psalms 6:5, 30:9, 39:13, 88:10-12, 115:17; Isaiah 38:18, Ecclesiastes 9:4-5, 10); yet there are other passages of hope and confidence after this life (Job 19:25-27; Psalm 16:9-11; 73:24).

 

iv. Remember though, that it was Jesus, not the Old Testament, which brought life and immortality to light through the gospel (2 Timothy 1:10).


Thursday, June 03, 2004

www.berkeleyacademics.com.

What is it? It's our new academic program that targets students from 4th grade to 8th grade.

OUR VISION

Berkeley Academics was launched to help students realize their maximum potential. Due to the increasing competition for college admissions, students must lay the foundation of academic excellence from an early age. Our Summer Academic Camp was designed to provide students with the skills necessary to secure entry into the nation's elite institutions of higher learning. Taking college prep cram courses in high school isn't enough anymore. Through high-caliber, engaging and personal instruction, students enrolled in our program will build academic competence and gain confidence in their ability to succeed. We at Berkeley Academics know first-hand the enduring value of a top-notch education. We believe that you and your child will find our summer program a worthwhile investment.

OUR APPROACH

Verbal and Math ability forms the crucial foundation of a student's entire academic career. Our core classes focus on mastering vocabulary, critical reading and math. These classes cater to each student's level. Our multi-tiered curriculum provides challenging material for students no matter how many sessions they take. With each session, students can advance to the next level. Students will be able to track their progress through the summer.

 

However, excellent academic records alone are not enough for admission to the top universities. Therefore, we offer a variety of elective classes that provide the opportunity to explore interests while developing creativity and self-confidence. Elective classes include robotics, art, drama, sports, speech & debate and science. Our entire program is modular and flexible so that it can be customized for each student


Monday, May 17, 2004



I'm currently reading John Ortberg's book, If you want to walk on water, you've got to get out of the Boat and one paragraph that stands out is:
"All human beings, including you and me, give their lives to something. Between this day and your last day, you will give your life to something. The only question is, what will you give your life to? Will it be worthy?”

I find this a great challenge for everyone, Christian or not. Will you give your life to the endless pursuit of what our society portrays as beautiful only to have gained nothing? Will you chase after your own selfish desires for comfort at the cost of others? Will you waste your life partying and getting drunk for the fun of it? Will you seek the fictitious romance portrayed by the media, never to find the ideal person because you put all your hopes in a person that is just as broken as you? What is your life? How are you spending it? What is it amounting to? This really challenges me to look at my life and see how I give my life to different things. What are the things I am giving my life to right now?

I watched Troy the other day with Mina, My, and Alice. The story wasn’t played out well, but of course the characters were very physically beautiful. This is an example of how Satan lures our attention to lusting after persons or images that we may never get and if we do we still are not satisfied.

It was interesting deciding what to do with my day. I’m done with finals, while the rest of my buddies still are stressing away. I was thinking about going shopping, but the devotional passage today helped me see in the proper perspective and I decided to spend time with people.

1 Corinthians 7: 29-31
29What I mean, brothers, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they had none; 30those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep; 31those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.

Life is short. Since none of us can keep it, how will we spend it? My answer is clear.

Is yours??



Friday, March 12, 2004

Since I have not been on xanga, I will update with reflections

Passion Reflection 3/11/04

As I watched The Passion of the Christ a second time what stuck out to me was what Psalm 130:4 is talking about. 'But with YOU there is forgiveness; therefore you are FEARED.' Again the meaning of fear strikes at me again. What is this fear that this psalmist is referring to and the fear that is mentioned so many times in the Scriptures?

It is the fear of hurting the one we so dearly honor and love. Fear of falling into the same sins again. A fear that is also afraid to the HOLY JUST God. Oh lord, in so many ways I am confronted with my ugliness. You had to die this way. For our sin. For my sin. You became sin for all of us. You became sin for me. You chose to go through all the pain both physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Why? Because of Love. The only solution was this horrible traversty of a death. The shame, you scorned it! You conquered death, so that we could have life the way you intended it. You conquered death, so that I could live my life the way you intended for me.

Oh Lord, as I think back upon the movie and the time that Jesus was reflecting back when he was telling his disciples that they will be persecuted because he was persecuted. He told them not to be afraid. It reminded me of my cowardedness even after watching such a realistic depiction of my Lord's suffering. Oh lord, I cry out to you. Lord help me to say the verse, 'I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes;first for the Jew, then for the Gentile.'Romans 1:16 Lord, what am I so concerned about? Losing others positive opinions? I do not suffer to the point of bloodshed! Oh Father, I am unworthy, just as Peter, who denied knowing you. I did not do it directly but indirectly by not attributing my blessings due to your grace and my decision to die to myself and pick up my cross and follow you. Oh Lord, forgive me! What shall I do from here on? How shall I be bolder in my faith? It is for others' salvation that I must be BOLD. Why am I so concerned with myself? Lord the whole reason why I chose to be a facilitator for Education 190 was ultimately because this type of setting allow personal relationships to form so there are abundant opportunities to share the great news of the cross. Oh Lord, Paula commented that I amazed her because of the way I lived...so full of love, compassion, purpose. Yet what did I do after her compliment? I could not respond. I had nothing to say. Lord, you crossed my mind, but I was quiet to testify to your work in my life. Father, Father, forgive me...I pray that you will give me many more opportunities. Father, lord, if I truly cared for anyone, I would not hesitate to share the center of my life. That which is you...but I hesitate. My God My God. 'Out of the depths I cry out to you, o Lord; O Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry of mercy. If you, O lord, kept a record of sins, O lord, who could stand?? But with you there is forgiveness; therefore you are feared.'

After watching this again, I am overwhelmed with gratitude. I have no reason to complain for anything!! You have provided all my life. I have never known true suffering. You surround me with persons who love me despite my preachiness, my pride, my self-righteousness, my impatience. Oh Lord, I am so grateful!!

Lord your plea for us to abandon all and follow you is such a loving invitation. So many view following you as a cost of their freedom, yet that is not the case. We are often so blind to how if you are not who we submit to, our sin is...the way we get jealous or envious of others, especially those that we love, our selfishness, our greed (always unsatisfied with something...complaining about how we look, what we don't have, what we want..) and so many other ways we are enslaved by our sin. Lust, idolatry, lying, or whatever, to get what we want. Oh lord, how we don't see how much any sin grieves you. You know how much sin binds us and destroys us. O lord, if more would REPENT...have this fear that psalm 130:4 talks about. How is your invitation to follow you a loving invitation? Because you know that we destroy our own lives. Our selfish living/goals gets us no where in the end. What have we gained? Nothing! You long to restore us to health in all areas of our life!! In relationships, where their is envy, jealousy, competition; you are telling us that following you will restore our relationships with others to health. When it comes to the opposite gender...LUST reigns! You created sex to be a beautiful thing in the context of a covenantal marriage. What has it become? So many different versions and other ways of pleasure because lust can not be quenched!!! Even in relationships physical actions dominate and trully relating with each other diminishes or doesn't really exist. Lord you desire to restore us to Health!

O lord, when we claim we love you, where is reflected in our lives? What are our motivations behind the things that we do? Are you REALLY the center? Or are you a pseudo center that we can claim that we have so we appear to be holy, yet we are still sinning left and right? Where is the ACTIONS! Where is the life transformed?? How can we say that we love you when we don't know your word!? How can we claim amazing grace when we are so focused on ourselves, wallowing in self-pity or something? O Lord...help us to see ourselves!! What does your word say our GREATEST problem is?? SIN! Sin is wanting a life where the "I" is sovereign. Do we believe that? Do I believe that? What is the GREATEST thing that the Bible tells us that we need? Forgiveness.

My God My God, thank you for reminding me of my sinful nature how I am prone to stray. Lord, I am renewed once again to follow you with more conviction and obedience than ever. Father, I fear offending you because my sin grieves you. I fear hurting the one I love. Father, I fear you, for you are just...You will NOT be mocked by our lack of obedience! What is hidden will all be revealed to you in the end.

 



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